Background:
To be honest, this song is a bit sobering to me.
Don't get me wrong. I love it. I enjoyed composing, recording it, and the images in the video are fantastic. I love how well my son played percussion and sang in it (more on that below). Most of all, I love how happy it makes me and my boy when we watch it.
But...
It also shows the amazing human I’m responsible for. This creature is creative. He loves exploring, loves experimenting, inventing, and loves collecting things (and, of course, putting them in his pockets). I've said before his brain is crazy smart, and his drive for immersed experiences, to passionately satisfy his curiosity, it all makes me worry:
1) That I'll suppress his true potential
2) That he'll rebel trying to show he's worth my praise
3) That I'll not guide him well enough to hone his skills/temper/passion towards his God-given purpose
When he was 3, I thought his smiles were because he LOVED pockets. He always stuffed his hands in his pockets and walk around. He loved stuffing whatever he found in them, and he especially loved pulling that stuff out to share what he collected.
Now, as he’s gotten older, his love for exploring, experimenting, collecting, and sharing has grown. I can't tell you how many times he walks through the kitchen matter-of-factly stating "I'm going to build a machine" or...even more scary...walks through with a hammer and saw without saying a word. His love for life, to find out how the world ticks, how so many amazing creatures and things can be discovered…well, it shows me that his love of pockets only represents his inner passion for life...and maybe his need to prove his worth to his dad.
I've said many times (thanks to Dennis Miller for the analogy) that my primary job in life is to guide my kids through the rocky shoals of youth...sometimes with firm direction...so that they can avoid the sharp rocks and hidden dangers that can wreck their life (but not too firm, lest they over-correct and slam into the far wall of rebellion). The goal? Get them to the open sea, watch their sails catch wind, and stand on the shore amazed as they maneuver through the rolling ocean with skill, passion, and success.
I only hope that with Jaxon...my very best is good enough. My fear is that while I'm guiding him through the sharp rocks of youth, and avoiding the under currents that could pull him under, he will see past the current to a unique adventure that, if navigated properly, will propel him past the dangerous passage and he will collect another life skill (and more character) that will be essential in the open ocean.
I love you, little man.
I will guide you through these narrow shoals of youth the best I can.
I know we will not see eye-to-eye all the time, but know that I love you deeply, and am already proud beyond words.
When the time comes, you will reach the open ocean. Your momentum from wise choices and experiences will propel you into deep waters. You will raise your sails, lower your rudder, and instantly cut into the wind to travel wherever you and your faith takes you.
I can’t wait to see what you’ll do…
…what you’ll discover
…what you’ll invent
…who you’ll love
...where you'll live
...what you'll collect
...and...of course...
...what you’ll pull out of your pockets to show me.
Whatever it is, I know I'll be amazed, impressed, proud, and filled with love.
And then?
We'll smi-----le. Because you ARE, and forever will be, a pocket man.
Recording Specifics:
When I get the itch to record a song, it usually happens fairly quickly. That was the case for this song. I originally wrote the first verse in 2007 and in August 2011 decided I needed to record it. I spent a few days adding verse 2 and the bridge based on suggestions from Jaxon.
As I was mapping out the song, I had planned on a solo, but it didn't feel right (I guess that means I'm old enough to let the song tell me what it needs...rather than my ego to show off). With no solo, I needed a way to make the last chorus unique. In a brainstorm, I decided Jack needed to sing it. But would he? I didn't know. He is VERY shy when it comes to getting a lot of attention. But as you saw in the video, he was very happy to ham it up. We decided that what he doesn't like is attention he did not initiate or seek.
As you heard, he did great!
He then asked to play percussion. He found music sticks, egg shaker, and tambourine in my percussion shelf. He laid them out on a chair and said "I want to play sticks in the beginning, shaker in the bridge, and tambourine in the last chorus and end."
So...he did. In ONE TAKE he kept rhythm, switched instruments, and monitored his own volume by looking at the recording track to make sure he didn't go into the red too much.
The end 'banter' was another brainstorm. Jaxon and I poured through his room for things he found in his pocket over the months, then I wrote the script. Turns out it was too difficult putting the items in time with the music stand, so we recorded that part separately (and slower) then I synched the video with audio in post-production.
Not only am I happy with the song and video itself, but I'm thrilled with the time I got to spend with my little pocket man.
Verse 2: Here's my toad, it's from a pocket in my pants Next to the frog, and my sandwich, and some ants I put my hands right into my pockets and pull out my gum and my sand I put my hands right into my pockets and smile 'Cause I'm a Pocket Man
Bridge: If it's shiny, Or slimy, Or sharp, round, fuzzy or tiny I put them into my pockets, cause they're useful when I'm playing around Some day I think I'll empty my pockets out But right now I stuff more in to keep things from jumping out!
Verse 3: My name is Jack, and I got pockets in my pants I put stuff in, into the pockets of my pants I put my hands right into my pockets and pull out whatever I can I put my hands right into my pockets and smile... 'Cause I'm a Pocket Man
Like an un-tethered burst of happy that celebrates everything around me. I love those times. Like today…or like the day I wrote this song.
Now, there are times when I’m sad, too. I honestly think my range of moods is a pre-requisite for being a Hinter. I also think it's a gift. When I'm blue, I get really down, but that’s when I get thoughtful and write a good blog post...or a good song. I also think that without the blue, I wouldn’t know the happy like I do.
When I do find Happy, happy songs come out...like this one. It's just piano, so don't get all distracted waiting for the guitars...There's enough of those in other songs. I find it a challenge to write for a single instrument so every note has to count.
To celebrate when I get to say hello to Happy, let's raise a mug and toast, in no particular order, to some things that make me happy:
Composing The elation when it all comes together and I’m hearing music I love…and that I wrote. It’s jump up and fist-pump happy
My wife She adds the sparkle to everything on this list
Guitars
Adventurous travel
Oceans
Lobster Or any sea-faring food, really
Dark beer
More guitars
Lost Especially season 1
Late night talks with my oldest son
Really dark beer No, not a duplicate. this is a rare find.
My youngest son He's a lot like me. I’m so stinking proud and amazed at him. Also makes me sad because I fail him a lot, but that's for a later post
Playing piano Especially my 'pretty' arrangement of Raiders of the Lost Ark during a wedding prelude. That was some serious Happy
Driving fast Specifically, driving fast while listening to Eddie and the Cruisers II in my college-days sports car on my way to surprise my then-girlfriend now-wife in Eau Claire
My music collection …See “driving fast”
Tequila Reposado or Añejo preferably
My daughters I call them Spitfire and Pistol. What a journey they’re taking me on!
Concerts Actually depends on the performance. Always worthwhile, but sometimes I get blue because I’m not up there playing with them
Working outside Mowing, gardening, trimming trees, love all of it
Campfires Marshmallows wrapped in tortillas grilled in campfire pie-maker. Amazing!
I could put a hundred more items in the list.
Funny, but nothing in that list includes technology…something that I spend MOST of my time interacting with during work and while at home.
Maybe that should tell me something.
My faith isn't listed in there, either. But there's a reason for that.
I personally find that having a faith in Jesus makes everything in that list stay Happy. With my faith, I have an anchor, a sense of purpose (that I many times forget but eventually remember). That anchor makes the list fun! Without it, those things in my list would be potential sources of purpose…and would quickly be removed from my ‘fun’ list and move to my ‘obsessive’ or ‘destructive’ list.
I composed this for a live theatre production at the Rochester Community and Technical College called “Imperfect Apple”. It was the opening number where we see the young lead character for the first time giving her wonderful, and happy, outlook on life. We soon learn she faces cancer, and the rest of the play revolves around her thoughts and journey through her treatment.
It was an awesome show!
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A test to see how much fun was I having in my life.
I Failed. Miserably.
But that very day God provided a solution…
…become a Peacemaker.
More specifically, become an international-traveling, life-loving, experience-embracing, concert-screaming, “Here’s To Life!”-saluting Roger Clyne and the Peacemakers fan.
Now, 3 years, 9 shows, 7,406 miles, 2 countries, 5 cities, dozens of shots of tequila, 9 albums, and 8 hotels later, I can truly say I am having more fun, soaking in better music, enjoying a better marriage, drinking better tequila, and am more energized to take a big bite out of this beautiful world than I ever thought possible.
How did this happen?
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It was May 6th, 2007. My wife was gone on a weekend getaway, and I was home in the middle of another “Hey I’m almost 38 and I need to behave like an adult with 4 kids and a mortgage that won’t quit so don’t tell me I need to squeeze fun into the middle of my busy, career-building, debt-soaked life” day.
Little did I know God had already put in motion a grand plan to put a smile back on my heart.
At church the topic was “God Loves Fun”. The main point was that God loves it when we have fun…good ol’ fashion barn-burning, doesn’t-have-to-be-spiritual-to-be-God-affirming fun. During the service we took a test to measure how much fun we were having in our lives.
I failed, and not just a “hey, maybe you should see an extra movie once in a while” kind of fail, but a “Sheesh, you’re stifling your life by taking it all way too seriously” kind of fail.
Then the cavalry rode in to rescue me…
…with my wife leading the charge, a glyph flag waving in the wind, and a rock n’ roll band singing about Mexican moonshine, contraband, hourglasses, grains of rice, and leaky little boats.
The wife pulled into the driveway happier than I’ve seen her in a long time. She had just experienced her first Roger Clyne and the Peacemakers (RCPM) concert the night before (Cinco de Mayo) with her friend Lisa and was already breathing in the good vibrations of life.
I then proceeded to tell her of my test…and how grandly I failed it. Within 2 minutes, the next 36 hours (and really the rest of my life) were set. It went something like this:
ME: …then it said I needed to find something fun. Something spontaneous. HER: RCPM is playing tonight in Des Moines! LETS GO! ME: You’re nuts. HER: (eyes sparkling, smile gleaming, toes bouncing) ME: What about the kids, catching up on work, and who would want to go with us? HER: James and Lisa! I know she’ll call within 10 minutes saying that they’re going! (seconds later) HER: “Hello? Lisa! …Awesome! …working on him now. See you in 30 minutes” ME: Ummm… HER: “Hello? Mom, we need a favor…yes…20 minutes. Thank you!” HER: All set. Lets Rock. ME: But… HER: COME ON!
30 minutes later we were fleeing our mundane home towards a temporary Sonoran oasis in Des Moines to see RCPM. During the trip we got a crash course in the history of RCPM, The Refreshments, someone named Buddy, and listened to as many songs as possible.
3.5 hours later RCPM took the stage.
The quick snare roll led into the infectious guitar riff that offered us a special kind of contraband. We were off on a journey led by an experienced troubadour through the adventures that life had in store for us if we just opened ourselves to the opportunities.
The Telecaster started the very next song with a perfect rhythmic riff offering us to go down together while the Les Paul blasted licks that sounded how red wine tastes..we liked that a lot.
By the end of the night, when the songs were mere echoes in our heads, the limes had been bitten, and our back-stage conversations with the band were over, my life-lens had been re-focused. I was given a musical medicine that could mend my attitude when it faltered.
I discovered it wasn’t a mundane home I was fleeing after all. It was a mundane attitude on life. I had everything one could hope for, except the ability to recognize it. The vibrations I heard that night brought me closer to God, my wife, music, and my kids. I began to remember what it felt like to compose a song. How a 2 line lyric backed by the right chords can melt a heart, unify a crowd, and make a soul come alive.
I remembered what it was like to have fun.
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I realize now that while it’s hard work to live life with a passion, and that it takes energy to squeeze the most out of this world, the results are well worth it:
A far happier attitude
A marriage closer and lovelier than I could imagine
A domestic adventure worth cherishing (con quatro niños!)
An expectation that something great is about to happen every day
And here’s the best part: we don’t go to RCPM shows to escape our lives…instead we have infused this life-loving RCPM attitude into our daily living. Going to an RCPM show is our way to add fuel to our peace-and-love-through-rock-and-roll fire that burns in our hearts.
Thank you Roger, Jim, P.H., Nick, Steve for providing the contraband.
Thank you wife for sailing on this beautiful adventure by my side.
Thank you God for showing me how rich and textured a life can be.