Building a Strong Foundation

My wife crafted this on our Cape Cod vacation. To her, it was a quick way to represent our whole family…me, her, our 20-year-old, two 16-year-olds, 14-year-old, the dog, and even the cat on top.

I took this photo because I loved what she created, and, since it was such a beautiful location, I wanted to remind us what Marconi Beach looked like nearing sunset.

Now when I look at it, all kinds of thoughts swirl around in my head…here are some…

• That's me on the bottom. The foundation. I think that reflects reality of our family, but I don't feel very foundational. 

• I don't think we had any idea what were were building when we started out...just me and Her facing the world

• What a life we've built. What an amazing, beautiful, wind-blown, facing-the-sun-and-feeling-the-warmth-on-your-face satisfying life.

• There are way too many days that I don't see our life this way...I spend too much time face down in the wet sand...trying to keep the waves from knocking our family off balance...never really taking a chance to enjoy what we have.

• We're not always comfortable with each other…I mean…look at all the sand in those tight places!  Yet, we all depend on each other. (even me…I may be on the bottom but need them to keep our family tall and strong)

• This is a lot of responsibility.

• On a good day it makes me so proud and I want to show off this family to the world (like the photo represents).

• On a bad day I feel so much pressure…trapped…unable to be "free" without disrupting…and potentially toppling...this family. I think of our financial waves that wash in and out…it's up to me to keep it flowing until the kids have flown…and that severely limits any changes I can make to find "happiness"...whatever that means. 

• I can't really control whether this family, or any one member, becomes unbalanced or falls away...After all, we are on a beach...where storms and waves can completely alter our landscape (the Cape Cod outer beach, the location of this photo, is notorious for changing/eroding/building all the time)

• Everything is temporary. I'm certain some high tide, remote storm, or direct gale wiped out any evidence of this stone tower my wife made. My only hope is what I've done to support this family lasts longer than I do.

One more...

Maybe this photo represents how God sees me and our family...from a wider aperture than what I can at the bottom of the pile. He can see the waves, the dunes, what's to come, what would be best for our little family tower...

...and I need to rely on His perspective far more than I do now...

...I need to listen

...relax

...and most of all, I need to enjoy these moments. They'll wash away far too soon.

Sunsets, Aruba, and Peace

By the time we landed in Aruba, we had already had quite an adventure in New York City on New Years Eve. To be honest, we wondered if we would find this island as wonderful as the island we visited the night before.

Then we saw the sunsets. And by the time we left, we had remembered that if we pause each evening...together...thinking about what we have...who we love...how precious our time is...we will enjoy life more, appreciate the moments more, and not let little troubles cloud our attitude...

...after all, as you can see...a few clouds makes the experience richer, more textured, all around better than if it was only a clear horizon with no context.

(click photo to view larger photos...they're really awesome larger!)

Apparently our resort on Eagle Beach was THE PERFECT location to view sunsets

The glistening wet sand as the waves retreat into the water added a unique sparkle as if we were witnessing a 'double' sunset.

The ability to float in the very salty, perfect temperature water and take in the sunset was unforgettable. I love how the silhouettes of my kids reinforce this immersive experience we had...all together.

Some sunsets were enjoyed laying on the beach chairs and letting the trade winds keep us perfectly content...

Even the US Coast Guard (who patrols the waters between Aruba and Venezuela) added to the beauty of this night's nearly cloudless sunset.

Still other nights the pirate ship, announcing a night of fun was about to commence, provided a stunning pairing to the sun as it set.

Some sunsets became more stunning with guest appearances by various ships

I learned early to turn the camera around and capture who I get to share these sunsets with. I think it just makes them all the more better.

Especially if we can share the sunset by floating next to each other

One of my favorites. My waterproof camera provided some fantastic sunset photos...I love how the waves sparkle like diamonds in the setting sun light.

...or this one that shows how the setting sunlight is still strong enough to pierce waves and show wave-innards.

Or how this sunset captured native wild-life in flight

...or how my wife simply paused...relaxed...focused...and let herself be carried away by the setting sun

Of course my girls couldn't resist taking a handstand photo with the sunset!

Last sunset of our trip was also enjoyed by pelican and sailboat. I honestly think we had the better view...the sailboat people didn't have an awesome sailboat in their view!

A different sunset, same beautiful lady.

Last view, a touch of clouds...adding to the texture, an observation I forget far too often.

A happy, beautiful, content lady at peace. That is the goal, after all, isn't it?

Finding Christmas...At This Second

This year I tried to find my Christmas spirit.

I don't really even know what 'Christmas spirit' means, because it's been defined so many times. 

Here's what I'm finding it for me...that it's defined in individual seconds of time.

It's about focusing on the light in the darkness...not only with the decorations my wife so wonderfully creates, but in my own life. I do realize my 'dark' is pretty bright compared to others I know, but it doesn't stop me from not enjoying what I have...

....but as I discover through these photos:  Without darkness, the light around me wouldn't be so cherished

Snow. I love snow with outside lights.

Nothing really deep here, I just feel at peace when I'm out in a gentle snow with Christmas lights on.

I get emotional when I see this one. There's something about the color red in the winter night lit by Christmas lights. Maybe its telling me to focus. That I get so distracted I can't enjoy simple, essential experiences.

Sometimes Christmas time is bleak. Many times I feel how this photo looks. While this photo is just a longer exposure of a gentle snow, it brings a notion of dark...despair...as it turns out, it was taken just about the same time I learned of an old high school friend whose husband suddenly died in a work accident. I don't have words for her but all I can do is try to appreciate what I have now...at this second.

...and then there's this dog. This 30 pound animal has found a way to dig a hole so deep in our hearts and settle in there for all time. In one breath I love it and hate it...knowing that she'll be around a couple handfuls of Christmases. 

...again, cherish what I have now...at this second

Cactus bites...a favorite appetizer that our kids make.

My girlies are growing, maturing, and surprising me with their awesomeness. They have the world waiting for them!

All kids...proud of each one...every one has their strengths and while I keep saying "I can't wait to see what unfolds", I should be just saying "So grateful for this second with them". Because while planning is important, cherishing what is happening at this second is most important...and something I've failed to teach them.

...of course, the next second, they are not posed, but reflect their natural state :-)

Our whole family...quite a year, and we are all together...at least for the moment.

Of course the dog wonders why she's not the center of attention :-)

Finally, my oldest finding joy in his 18 year love of legos...

In the end, I found that each second can hold its own expression of Christmas Spirit...from fun, to thoughtful, to sad, to an overwhelming feeling of contentment that I really don't need anything, that everything I long for is right here.

Merry Christmas.

Back In The Game

December 11th was the first gymnastics meet I saw of my 9th grade daughter since she started high school gymnastics (competing varsity level). After a rough previous year at club gymnastics, and a lot of injuries, I was extra excited to see her compete. 

Of course I brought my camera.  It was so fun to capture...

The poise she brings to the floor:

(click photo for larger gallery view)

The way she floats across the vault:

Suspends herself in mid-air:

Focuses on her lines during her routines:

Her team - the support and camaraderie...and smiles!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Now I try to pick the 'best' shots, but as I look at her performance, there are other great shots of her so figured why not show those as well, like...

Running to the vault:

 Leaping up and forward to snap herself off the vault:

 High on the bars:

 Spinning and landing:

 This seemed like too many shots but I couldn't decide which one to cut. each one has its own uniqueness:

 More suspending in air...this time in a pike position:

 Running all-out to get to tumbling speed:

I've always loved this pose:

and her flexibility:

 ...and of course I love capturing my Julia: