Saturday, February 19, 2011

A REAL Hintermeister – Marriage Quiz

If you look around the Hinterland, you may notice an extra dose of
affection in our marriages. While communication, hard work, and listening are common ingredients, there is also an extra "something" that makes a HinterMarriage work.
Take this quiz to see if you have a dose of HinterMojo in your marriage.
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Scenario 1: Your wife is playing a timed game in her phone which requires all of her concentration.
Do you:
A) Wait to talk while while at the same time enjoying the beauty of her face. Additionally, you spend the time thinking how you can make her happier knowing as soon as she is able she will focus on you.
B) Tell her some bad news...most likely she won't hear it. But later,
you can truthfully say "but I told you last Sunday"
C) Ask permission to buy a new gadget (read: guitar). Most likely she'll just hear "can I... " and just say yes. Note: be sure to have your shopping cart full to the point of "confirm purchase". That way the time between her "Yes" and " Wait, what?” only needs to be 1.37 seconds long to finalize the purchase.
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Scenario 2: You and the missus are deep inside Mayo Clinic on an all day adventure with your mended-heart girl, and there is NO SERVICE on either iPhone. Your wife pulls up a game to pass the time.
Do you:
A) Compliment her on her casual gaming skills
B)  Pull up a fancier-dancier game because she inherited your old phone, and while it was cool in 2008, you almost feel sorry for her vintage technology as you pummel your virtual opponent.
C) After she starts her game, loudly state (so the echo tech can
hear), "Huh. No Internet connection. I guess I'll do what I always do: pull out my Bible app and read my off-line version of the New Living Translation. I wonder what Haggai can teach me today? Honey, do you want to read along? Well, maybe your heart will soften some day"
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Scenario 3: Your Bride complains about all the laundry she has to do with 6 humans in the house.
Do you:
A) Offer to take over the laundry chores
B) Offer your kids as humble laundry servants. That's the second reason why you had 4 of them anyway. (The first being, of course, being that a family of 6 is the perfect fit for amusement park rides...whether the seats come in 2-2-2 or 3-3 configurations)
C) Embark on your one-man campaign to reduce laundry-ready clothes by wearing the same jeans, cozy shirt, and fleecy the whole week long...only putting on new undergarments each day...ok...once every two days.
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Scenario 4: You're turning down the street with your blinker on, and you use your tongue-clicking skills to create a crazy complex rhythm that combines ethnic tribal beats with the turn signal. Your wife says to stop acting like your 7 year old and be quiet!
Do you:
A) Apologize and turn the radio back to “songs we thought were cool in the 80’s”
B) Feign shock at her dissing your new found gonna-retire-a-gojillionaire tongue-rhythm skills and vow to only let her visit you in your tongue-shaped mansion twice a month
C) Triple-down and add lip spurty razzberries, guinea-pig-throat-grunts, and perform your “Shower-stall symphonies” until she remembers she married you for richer and poorer, sickness and health, adolescent and mature.
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How did you score?
If you chose:
A) You will learn the hard way that women don’t really want sincerity and apologies. Good luck.
B) Your HinterMojo is brewing but still needs some time in the fire
C) HinterMojo is nicely adding fire to your marriage and you are closer than ever to her realizing you already ARE the perfect mate.

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